"dear, dear diary...
i wanna tell my secrets
and i dont think you're the one i know who will keep them..."
Monday, March 26, 2007
you're the one mistake/ i really didn't mind/ so beautiful, unmerciful/ it took me down/ you fake it easy just to please me/ don't you know/ it's not like i haven't tried over and over again/ sleepless nights, wrong or right/
my darling girl. you look so pretty and innocent.
you look just like mummy.
i'm so proud to have you, baby.
so harmless, nobody's gonna harm you.
the only thing that'll harm you is us, me and mummy.
mummy told me she doesnt feel the same way as she felt before.
sometimes shit just happens, but i'll never be able to forgive myself.
and mummy doesnt treat me as nice no more.
the thing is, i gave her my everything. i gave in to her demands.
i sacrificed so many things just to please her.
some she never knew.
i gave her the world. i knew no limits.
and she's that one person i'm willing to die for.
i think me and mummy met for a reason.
and i'm thankful to Him.
but i gotta do what's best for us.
some things are just more important than me.
i've cried a river. i've bled a stream.
and it seems like the hallway to happiness has faded.
when you're old enough to understand or feel what love is, always remember that i love mummy so much. i love her with all my heart and soul. i'd love her till my dying day.
and i love you too. we both love you.
dont forget to spew your milk out on grand dad's shirt if he feeds you.
take care of mummy when i'm gone.
i gotta go now. i'm sorry.
tell mummy i've been missing her terribly.
tell her i love her.
*cocks*
in your face 7:24 PM
Saturday, March 17, 2007
and i know you heard the last song about the girls that didn't last long/ but i promise this is on a whole new plane/ i can tell by the way she says my name/ i love the way she calls my phone/ she even got her very own ringtone/ if that ain't love then i don't know what love is/
remember
the first time i saw your face.
the first time we spoke.
the first touch.
the jokes we did on each other.
the first time we met.
the first movie we ever watched.
the first time we held hands.
the first time we kissed.
the first time we hugged.
this feels like the very first day.
who knew.
they dont.
but i do.
i truly, fucking do.
i love you baby.
sleep tight. good night.
in your face 11:28 AM
Saturday, March 10, 2007
pride can stand a thousand trials/ the strong will never fall/ but watching stars without you, my soul cries/ heaving heart is full of pain/ oh, oh the aching/ 'cause i'm kissing you, / i'm kissing you/ touch me deep, pure, and true/ give to me forever/ 'cause i'm kissing you, / i'm kissing you/ where are you now?/ where are you now?/ 'cause i'm kissing you/ i'm kissing you/
i pray that this will not be forever.
my motivation, inspiration in life.
i've never tasted anything like this before.
i'm like a prisoner, serving his sentence.
leave you be.
i just cant.
what i have now is only photos of you.
i can only reminisce about the past.
things are not going to be the same anymore.
i dont understand. but i think i do.
and i deserve it.
thank you god, for sending her down from heaven.
i've never thanked you enough.
i'm sorry. i'm so sorry.
in your face 8:49 PM
there ain’t no more satan to impeach your soul/ he can’t affect you, he can dissect you/ and change your mind/ bad thoughts can direct you/ defects can be gains/ your worries are tainted/ mistakes can be saints/ cause they can correct you/
at six in the morning, i was still * ___________________*. i fell asleep soon after. but i woke up at around seven; i dreamt that she called. i literally stood up. there wasnt any call. i couldnt stop * _______________*. and it happened again at eight. i got up and reached for the phone. it was just a dream. i couldnt sleep after that. i just * ________________* and ________________*.
in your face 8:00 AM
Friday, March 09, 2007
if this is true love, you wouldn't do what you did last time/ you wouldn't screw up this time, cause this time/ i'm telling you what, you do it again *______________ *, no matter what/
you're the one person i cant live without.
god knows how much i need you.
god knows how much i love you.
and i can't seem to move on.
not without you.
never seemed, never will.
and i won't stop * _______________________ * till you come back again.
i'm so exhausted. i get shitted on every fucking day. i cant even get a good night's sleep when i have the chance to. i'm always under constant attacks. i coughed out fresh blood this morning. i'm at the extreme point where i could just say, "fuck it. i'm done". but when it comes to that one special person, i'd do anything just to see that beautiful smile. i was even willing to go beyond the limits. how much can one take? that wasnt even an issue at all. the fact that i sacrificed everything just to be with that one person, i knew s/he was the perfect one. i reflected back on myself. no matter what she did, no matter what drama it was, i was always there to catch her when she falls. but i screwed up, again. and there's no turning back. i'm willing to change all that. i know i've said it so many times. i'm just human. and you are too. that's why i always run back to your arms time and again. and for now, i beg for you to come back. i'll do anything.
kiss me when i cry.
be with me by my side.
i've always thought you are the one i've been waiting for all these while.
in your face 4:46 AM
Saturday, March 03, 2007
it's a fucking zoo out here/ these fucking chimpanzees, fucking monkeys talking about me/ it's the first to the mud, bitch/ bitches out on the curb, i'm like "look at these dunks"/ bunch of fucking jackasses/
all talk, no cock.
hahaha.
you fucking coward. tell me who you are and i'll make it happen.
fucking coward. pussy punk ass fuck.
my loose leaf, your whole persona's weak.
i am the guy your father never was, or could've been fucking your dead grandmother, had to struggle six feet up, out her grave to * censored * just because i refuse to pick up the shovel.
i have the whole dictionary written on my dick.
hold up, hold up.
how about putting some words in your mouth.
speak now or forever hold a dick in your mouth.
in your face 6:56 PM
Thursday, March 01, 2007
fucking dummies/ this ain't chess/ you playing motherfuckin checkers/ this shit is all day man it's too easy/ you 'bout to get your motherfucking asses jumped/ fucking punks/
they dont matter anymore.
do it again.
just where the hell are they.
in your face 7:26 AM
Saturday, February 24, 2007
they say that every man grows up to marry his own mother/ which would explain why you're such a motherfucking bitch/ you're the ink to my paper/ where my pen is to my pad/ the moral, the very fiber/ you are the word i am looking for when i'm trying to describe how i feel inside/ and the right one just won't come to my mind/ the bitch who never took half/ the wife who never divorce me/ you let me beat the shit out of you/ before you beat the shit out of me/
in your face 8:07 AM
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